Impending Doomsday

Ok,so doomsday is melodramatic but my impending 2nd appt with psych doc does feel pretty hopeless. I thought I was wrong about her initially because she called me herself that one time so.maybe she does care and takes me seriously. The last near appt when she ran behind and I had to get a sick kid to the only open slot so.I rescheduled…resulting in crazy med confusion,difficulty getting refills (and insurance problems) and the nurse basically saying the dr thinks I am just trying to get refills without seeing her…UGH!

So now I go into this appt terrified and wary as a feral animal,stressed to breaking by the pending disability review…bad juju abounds. It permates my bones,boils in my blood,twists and contorts my innards…I wouldrather do anything but face the woman and try to hold my vitriol ba k. That is the thing withme being scared. I get panicked but anger spews forth as much as do tears. I am not always my own best advocate.

But I will go,fighting my panic and misgivings.I will try to keep an open mind and not cynically judge the woman. Wish I could expect the same but for all the professional spiels-even pros like doctors are human and come with biases. I AM going to m

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